Some May Call Me Difficult

>I’ve been reading the Change and Cherish Historical Series by Jane Kirkpatrick these last few days. In many ways I relate to the main character Emma.

Independent thinker. Not satisfied with status quo. Challenges convention. Desires to make her own way.

For some, we are difficult women, Emma and I. For our husbands, we are character builders. 🙂

Sometimes I think I am the most impractical decision my practical husband has ever made, but I’m still thrilled that he chose to take a chance on me, with me.

As I read these books, I see myself as an on-looker might describe me, and at times I am humbled by love poured out to a woman like myself for I too have benefited from luxurious love described between people on paper. And at times I am humbled because I see the error of a too strong-willed, stubborn woman and know that I’ve acted impulsively and selfishly on many occasions.

Therefore, I marvel at the love and understanding warmth my husband continues to extend to me, giving me love and sharing in the secrets that only become as time passes by and we remain steadfast in our commitments to each other. He remains, my faithful and loving husband.

I also marvel in the wonder of God’s love for me, so mysterious and deep and free. No matter how I many times I fail him or stand with my arms folded and fists clenched, refusing to yield and obey, He calls me back to his safety and support. And when I come, no matter the time whining or struggling or questioning I point in his direction, He welcomes me back with open arms and surrounds me with wonder.

Some may call me difficult, maybe He does too, but more than that He calls me beloved.

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